Really wana thank God for the week has over..Dunno why everytime I do project, I will never fail to have problem with computer..Days have been really hectic for the past few weeks besides dealing with projects..After weeks of struggles with matthew, i really couldn't take it anymore. We had a training with an invited pyschologist during the meeting just now. After the meeting, my head support asked me "so does today's meeting helps and applys to us?" I couldn't help but to tell her this, " actually I need help.." I almost break down when I told her but I held on my tears. I was surprised that before I said anything, she's already aware of my this extreme severe pupil..
This is my first time that I break down becos of my pupil. Feeling devastated. I couldn't manage..I thot I could suggest him to do a transfer as this school is not suitable for Intellecture disability pupils. But things dosn't seem to be so easy..I dunno how after this one week holiday when term 2 starts..Suddenly feel teaching is so tough now and there are so many things that's going to do n happen.Arhha...God..I need help..I need patience, wisdom, understanding, love for matthew once again n send people to help me..Sob....Very very stress...
But Im glad I came for gell group. Though Im not feeling good emotionally, I could still praise God n worship Him and I felt great. After hearing shuzhen n a bro from another cg's testimony, they made me reflect on my life and I think I have testi too.. Hehe..Ya, I learnt from pastor that to come for such mtg (may it be svc or cg), it is to minister to God n not just being ministered by God. Today, I experience both..really great.. Came to understand one thing; As I worship Him with a heart of giving n not just receiving, my faith is built. Becos I learnt to truely know who he is in my life. With that, I could begin to find rest in Him. My breakthrough is, though life's still stress n problem's still remain, I could still trust n love him even more instead of getting bitter. And I think with this love, Im really contented for just having Him with me in my life. I no longer have the thought of suicided n having depression. Instead, I do see that I have so much things to do in my life and with the Lord, the joy has live in me.
But I couldn't share these with others..Can someone share for me on my behalf? Haha..
